Hot Momma

My brothers and sister play a game I like to call Hot Momma.  Hot Momma is a version of the game Hot Potato.

I love my Mom. She is a 72 years old, retired, breast cancer survivor. I’m blessed to have a Mom especially because my Dad died when I was six. BUT my Mother is bored because she is retired and a lot of her friends have died. So what does a bored Mother do? Get on the last nerve of her children, grandchildren and if the great grandchildren were old enough to understand, them too.

So my siblings and I had a master plan to get her out of the house and out of NJ for at least 2 weeks. She was going to spend a few days in Virginia Beach with my brother, a few days in Richmond with my Uncle and a week in Maryland with my sister. But my Mom is having some issues with her blood pressure and until that can be put under control she refuses to leave NJ. So we are now hoping we can put this master plan in to action in August once she gets a clear bill of health from her doctor.

But until then my brother Michael and I are in this constant volley. To my brother’s credit, he deals with her most of the time. I usually get her every other weekend. And in the interim she had my nephew. Well my nephew moved so she is even more bored AND he was her driver so she won’t drive over to Harlem to see me. But as luck would have it, my brother has now agreed to bring her over more.

I was in NJ this weekend buying furniture and other stuff for my apt. With my bum elbow it was just too much to carry home on the bus and subway. So my Mom got my brother to bring me home. I have lived in Harlem for 5 years and my brother has never been to my apartment. He’s just busy and it cost $8 to get across the bridge so I understand. And he was bitching from the moment we got in the car. “I hope there isn’t any traffic or I’m going to be even more irritated.” He jokingly said I should charge you for gas and tolls. And then the turning point.

There was no traffic on the bridge, as I told him there wouldn’t be. And I live about 10 minutes from the bridge. When my brother saw how close and how easy it was for him to get to my apartment and get back home his WHOLE perspective changed. He said round trip it took him about 35 minutes and there was no traffic. So he said to my Mother when he got home, “If I had known it was that easy and Tiffany lived that close I would have been taking you over there all the time. In fact, I think I’m going to take you over there everyday.” My Mother’s reply, “Hell no.” Very good response by my Mom. We can only be together for a few hours before we are ready to kill each other. How we ever survived a trip to New Orleans I will never know.

So I’m about to be the biggest loser in the game of “Hot Momma,” because my brother will be able to drop her off but I won’t be able to as easily get her back home to him. But it’s all good. I’m glad my brother finally came over and I won’t feel bad asking him to bring my Mom over.